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family rules

My Older Sister

Lee’s life was a tragedy from start to finish.  She died a few years back.  But that was to begin at the ending.  In the beginning there was a problem.  A huge problem with her brain development and as she developed it became clear she was severely handicapped.  My sister became this mass of underdeveloped bones and brain.  It was very difficult on my parents to have a child like this.  Their dreams for this child evaporated and became a nightmare for them.  I had no clue of this really as she was always like this to me and I expected it from her.  She was irritable and cried constantly.  But I carried on as if this were normal, because to me it was.  And I was still so young while she lived with us.  She could not feed herself.  She could not bathe herself or do any functions we humans normally perform.  My father chose to ignore her.  My mother could not.  She had to deal with Lee on a daily basis which made her life very hard.  

Lee left us when I was five years old.  She was six years old when my parents found a home for handicapped children for her to live in.  Lee barely knew who we were so it made little difference in her life when she left us.  I’m sure she received much better care from the professionals there.  Lee didn’t miss us, but I sure missed her being around.  My sister was just gone.  I didn’t understand.  My mom tried to explain to me what had happened and why she was gone.  I was five.  

Then we never went to see my sister for about six months.  I was beside myself with the loss of my sister and imaged I would be next to go.  It was a difficult time for me.  Then one day my mother did take us to see Lee and I could see for myself how much better her quality of life had become in this new place for her.  It made me feel better for the loss of my sister.


About advocateformutiny

I will not be silent anymore.


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