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family rules

My relationship with Hannah

I had a real love/hate relationship with Hannah.  She was my baby sister and I loved her and spent a lot of my free time entertaining her before she was in kindergarten.  I would really enjoy spending time with her.  She liked me to spend time with her as well.  But it was obvious who the favorite daughter was for my mother.  Hannah and my mother are a lot alike.  They think alike and, most importantly, they look alike.  Pictures of my mother and my sister is when you can really tell how much they do look alike.  This gave my sister the clear advantage over me.  I did not realize this reason until years later which is a good thing for my sister.  I only knew my mother much preferred my little sister over me.  My mother read to Hannah.  My mother never read to me a day in her life.  My mother never raised a hand to my sister.  Hannah was lucky.  I was not so lucky.  I was very aware of this discrepancy and the reason for the hatred part of the equation.  Plus the fact that my sister never had to do any work around the house.  She would sit there and play while I had to do things like the laundry and dishes and yard work.  Every Saturday I would be working and cleaning the house while my sister just sat there and played in her room.  This was another cause for resentment.  I still managed to feel close to Hannah despite these differences.  

Hannah almost died when she was two.  She went into the hospital and almost did not come home.  She had pneumonia and spiked an extremely high fever.  It was a tough night when we were not sure if she was going to come home.  But she did get better and come home.  It was a good day when this happened.  I knew I wanted her to come home very badly and it was such a relief when she did come home.


About advocateformutiny

I will not be silent anymore.


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